How much did you pay to feel good in 2025?
And why maintaining your well-being will be more expensive in 2026.
The most important thing I have finally understood in 2025 is that there is a big difference between doing things to get results and doing things to feel good.
Participating in online courses is an excellent illustration. Statistics are brual. Only 20% people complete courses they bought. That number is way to small to account for low quality, lack of time or too many personal complications. I found it hard to believe that 80% of buyers is so poor at planning.
The simplest explanation is that those people buy courses without the real intention to finish them. But why would they do that?
There are two reasons for that, and the first is displacement.
Displacement
Displacement happens when people have to deal with a situation they do not know how to deal with. And very often, instead of properly solving the challenge, they take a completely unrelated action as taking action resolves the tension of indecisiveness.
An example that I give to my students is actually quite common: imagine that you have to study for an upcoming exam in a subject you do not like. You faice a following choice:
Study.
Students know that this is the right thing to do, yet they barely acknowledge mental suffering related to doing something they do not like.Party.
Some people argue that it is an investment in interpersonal skills. I do not judge. Choosing this option feels wrong, albeit during the party people might feel much better.
The problem is that during the time of the decision, both options feel wrong. And many people get overloaded with tension, and they do the first thing that is acceptable in the situation and resolve the tension - they clean their rooms.
Unfortunately, it does not help their exams nor interpersonal skills, which means that their situation will get worse, both on:
emotional level - because you have got less time for preparation, and the tension is even greater
objective level - because you have got less time for preparation
Escape a difficult choice a few times in that way, and it becomes a mental habit.
Marketing
Marketers learned a long time ago that people seek emotional relief rather than working products. One of the marketers I respect says:
Do not sell people an alarm clock. Sell them a disciplined version of themselves.
In other words, people do not care about the actual tool or product, they care about who they will become in the future.
How this comes together
Do not be a person that buys online courses to feel better. Or buys a new keyboard or a note-taking system to reduce tension. They all have monetary cost - which is not negligible but also is not the most important. The most important cost is in missed opportunities - in lost time, and in consequences that make your situation progressively worse.
I strongly encourage you to evaluate your spending patterns for 2025 - and do an honest assessment of where did you placed your bets - and what have you got in return.
Discipline of Planning
A somewhat unexpected realization for me was how much my life had to change in order to start living according to ‘face the real challenge’ perspective.
The first trick is that you need to maintain a good mental form. If the reality catches you off guard (like when you are exhausted or stressing about something), you will make decisions you might regret.
The second trick is that, if you try to change your own habits, you need to reduce decision fatigue, which involves making decisions when you are emotionally detached from them. That way, I do not spend time thinking of whether I should do for a workout. I make that decision a day before when I do not feel yet the pain of going out in a rainy day. It is far easier to focus on doing what I have planned then :).
The third trick is that sticking to your plans requires very careful planning, but not just usual planning (I will do X,Y,Z), but detailed planning that takes into the account your mental state (“what if the time hits and I do not feel like working out”).
All the best in 2026, and may your situation improve!